A litany of misfortune

June 19, 2011 § Leave a comment

It occurred to me, shortly after I had nicked my leg with the shoddy razor that Holiday Inn Express had lent me and watched it bleed for three full hours, then burnt my right pointer finger while curling my friend J’s hair, and broke my beautiful leather watch’s strap because of a bizarre maneuver where I was lowering the toilet seat but it was so heavy that it crashed down and snapped on my watch, that I was the receptacle of all misfortune at my friend A’s wedding in Ohio yesterday.

It is appropriate in some sense. Better that it happen to me than the bride or groom or vital member of the wedding party, right? I told the minister that I needed a classical Greek counterpart to explain myself. In Hindu culture (and I suppose Jewish, Islamic, and Greek…) there is the superstition (no wait, it’s real) of the evil eye, and that I was probably accumulating all this bad luck because of an absence of a nazar or protective talisman on my body. I thought about running to the bathroom and using my eyeliner to draw a little black dot on my chin. I’ve seen mothers do this to babies in India. As I came to this decision, I took my seat at table 6 and realized that D, maid of honor at the party and one of my best friends from college, had spelled my name on the seating placard: Samyukti. I drank copious amounts of wine.

The disaster continues. I got roughly 22 minutes of sleep last night between coming back to the hotel room at 3 am and getting myself up shortly thereafter to make it from Cincinnati to Dayton, OH for a 6 am flight. But of course, my flight was delayed and I was reshuffled on to a 10 am flight. Ten minutes ago, before I started recording my miseries here, I breezily walked in, contact-lens-less but still very culpable, into the men’s bathroom.

It was not empty.

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